Six H's to a healthy relationship

Six H's to a healthy relationship

1. Honesty. What is the most important quality of a lasting relationship? The number one quality mentioned was honesty. Finances can be shaky, sex imperfect, stress overwhelming, but all those things can be overcome. Trust is essential. If trust is broken, your heart is broken. Everything else seems to tumble down, problems become less tolerable, and compromises less appealing. 

2. Harmony. The sweetest sounds in music are created when two voices harmonize with one anotherone hits a note that is not exactly the same as the other, but blends in perfectly. Better yet, it enriches the first note, filling out the sound. Two people in love similarly make beautiful music together. They don't need to be the same; in fact, they are more well-rounded when they have differences, like the harmonized musical notes. Their individual choices of notes fit. You make a harmonious duet together. 

3. Heart. The heart is the major organ of the body. It pumps the blood supply throughout the body, bringing nourishment. Having heart for one another means nourishing each other. Opening your heart to one another exposes your deepest feelings. And connecting your hearts binds you deeply and inextricably. 

4. Honor. It's a word used in marriage vows for a reason. Honoring each other means holding each other in high esteem, considering each other's needs, and respecting each other and an even more revered consideration of each other, worshipping each other. This means knowing each other to the core, believing in each others soul, and appreciating each other beyond the physical body. 

5. Healing. In ancient India men came to a specially trained female, called a Dakini, to be healed after war. The Dakini helped him clear his mind from the traumas he had been through, so he could reopen his heart and love again. You may have to similarly suffer through love wars before you find your one true love. The rejections and hurts along this path require healing in order to open up your heart again. I'm not suggesting that you become each other's therapist would be unhealthy to expect a partner to repair all your past hurts or to project onto your partner all the ghosts of your past. But there is some aspect of healing in every healthy relationship. A true love partner becomes a haven from the hurts of the past, while providing a new positive example of how nurturing love can be.

6. Hot. Satisfying, sensuous, and erotic sex can certainly be a part of the healthy relationship equation. Having such a healthy sexual connection can increase your intimacy and bind you closer together. 

Spelling a Healthy Relationship 
Consider these other crucial elements of a healthy relationship. 
The Five E's: 

Empathy. Being able to feel what each other feels, walking a mile in the other person's shoes, being able to put yourself in his place. This goes beyond sympathy where you can feel for the other person (you're sad if something sad happens to them) to the point where you feel what it feels like to be in his skin (feeling sadness as he does). 

Equality. Respecting the fact that you both count. 

Energetics. The exchange of vibrations between you, experienced like an electrical force, drawing you to each other and allowing your interactions to feel like well-oiled and perfectly fitting gears. 

Enthusiasm. Excitement about being together. 

Empowerment. Supporting each other to feel effective. 

The Five A's: 

Acceptance. Knowing that you approve of each other. 

Accommodation. Making adjustments for each other's needs. 

Appreciation. Being responsive to and grateful for each other. 

Adaptability. Being able to make changes when necessary. 

Agreements. Making and keeping agreements is essential for trust in a relationship. When agreements are broken, trust is shattered and must be carefully rebuilt with new agreements that are kept. 

The Five L's:  

Love. Cherishing each other and holding one another dear. Love should be unconditional, meaning it does not waver depending on what you look like, earn, do, or say. 

Loyalty. Being devoted to each other unquestionably, knowing you would not betray each other. 

Listening. Paying attention to what each other says. 
 
Laughter. Humor is the most appealing characteristic that men and women find attractive. Laughter is both physically and psychologically healthy. Having fun is a great way to make you feel good about each other. 

Lust. Longing and desire draw you magnetically to someone. For a relationship to survive the stresses and grind of daily life, flashes of lust are necessary to spark the union and keep you together. 

The Five T's: 
Trust. Feeling you can rely on one another without question, and that you will not hurt each other. Having confidence and faith in each other that you can depend and count on each other without reservation. Feeling safe with each other. 

Talking. Communication is key. 

Time together. Making time to be together without distractions. 

Tenderness. Treating each other with kindness. 

Thoughtfulness. Being understanding, showing consideration in thoughts and deeds. 

And Y for Yes: 
Wipe the negative out of your life, mind, and love! Affirm, that yes, you both care; yes, you can make it work; and yes, you will try to give each other what you need.